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…tl;dr: those things are real. That’s not PhotoShop. Ketchup Doritos… for sale, in a public place.

I’m diabetic. Type 2. It took me years to get my numbers under control. But they’ve been completely out of control for the past month, thanks to the prednisone I take because of my kidney transplant. My numbers are ranging between 11mmol/L and 22mmol/L, where normal is between 4-7mmol/L… I have no idea what that means translated into Imperial, but basically my blood sugar ranges from High to Pure Sucrose.

My diabetes nurse has been increasing my insulins (I take two types: Humalin N, and Humalog) every week, but the numbers have been barely moving downwards.

It’s beyond frustrating.

The prednisone is also making it hard for me to concentrate, it’s fucking with my memory, making it very difficult to connect thoughts, and, just for kicks, it’s screwing with the manic depression. I’m only taking 10mgs as of today, that’s down from 45mgs nearly two months ago. But I’m still having to push my way through the day… survive each day. I’m not getting the weirder side effects, thank God.

…those would include weight gain, severe facial swelling, cataracts, severe swelling, mouth sores, severe joint pain, just for kicks it’s give you a peptic ulcer, avascular necrosis, and stretch marks along with about fifty other things.

Fatigue… that’s another one I’ve been living with. It’s a little better since the dosage has dropped, but it would still be difficult to operate heavy machinery if I had to.

The problem is, the medication is an immunosuppressant, so it’s basically keeping my new kidney working. Which means it’s keeping me working.

It’s just that I can’t remember shit, I can’t concentrate on shit, I can’t connect shit to shit, and I’ve been in a shit mood for the past eight weeks. And I’m going to be on at least 5mg of this shit for the rest of my… well, the rest of my life anyway, which I’ll be glad to have thanks to this shitty medication.

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…anyway, the song title Google-translates into “Today, my life is shit.” It’s by, Lisa LeBlanc and she’s one of my favourite artists.

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“Aujourd’hui, ma vie c’est d’la marde”, by Lisa LeBlanc, from her 2013 self-titled debut.

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À matin mon lit simple fait sur de me rappeler que je dors dans un lit simple.
avec les springs qui m’enfoncent dans le dos comme des connes.
j’ai pu l’gout qu’on me parle de conte de disney.
le prince charmant c’t’un cave pis la princesse c’t’une grosse salope.
y’en aura pas de facile.

peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.
peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.

j’avais les genoux mous pi toute c’étais la plus belle affaire du monde.
on aurait pu être l’inspiration d’une toune de céline dion.
mais quand y’a vu l’autre fille qui étais plus chics que moi.
il l’a ramené chez eux drette devant mes yeux.
ostie de gang de pas de classe.

peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.
peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.

j’ferais attention à toi mon petit gars parce que mes chums de filles veulent te casser les jambes
j’ferais attention à toi mon petit gars parce que mes chums de filles veulent te casser les jambes
j’ai l’air d’une grosse robineuse assie toute seule au bar
en bitchant toute la soirée à ceux qu’y’ont le malheur de m’écouter.
j’l’eu dit peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.
peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.
peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.
peut-être que demain ca ira mieux mais aujourd’hui ma vie c’est de la marde.

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…rough Google translation:

At morning my single bed made on to remind me that I sleep in a single bed.
With the springs that sink into my back like connes.
I could taste the disney tale.
The prince charming c’t’a cave and the princess c’t’a big bitch.
It will not be easy.

Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde (re: shit).
Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.

I had soft knees and everything was the most beautiful thing in the world.
One could have been the inspiration of a tonne of Celine Dion.
But when I saw the other girl who was more chic than me.
He brought him home in a hurry before my eyes.
Gang not class.

Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.
Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.

I would be careful to you my little guy because my girls chums (re: friends) want to break your legs
I would be careful to you my little guy because my girls chums want to break your legs
I look like a big robin sitting alone at the bar
By bitching all evening to those who have the misfortune to listen to me.
I told him maybe tomorrow will be better but today my life is from the marde.
Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.
Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.
Maybe tomorrow it will be better but today my life is from the marde.